If you are going through the unfortunate process of separating and divorcing, but have children in the home, you are in a position which nobody would really envy. However, it is worth remembering that many people have been there before you, and you are not alone. One of the main concerns here is always going to be ensuring that the children are looked after and that they are happy with the final decisions, as well as ensuring that the custody is fair. One of the difficulties here is that you both need to put aside your differences for the sake of what is best for the child, so make sure that you have a pact to do that, and you should find it goes much more smoothly than you might have imagined. To help that along, let’s also take a look at a few things to bear in mind to try and make the custody process as smooth as possible.
Listen To Each Other
It is natural to find that you are arguing during a time such as this. But if you are not able to really communicate with each other fairly and openly, you are going to get absolutely nowhere, and your children will suffer the consequences. So it is hugely important to make a point of really listening to each other, even if you find it difficult or if you find yourself getting worked up about what the other is saying. The more you allow each other to talk, the higher a chance you will have of making it all work out, so that is definitely something to bear in mind. Listening to each other will mean that you can get through the process faster and with fewer difficulties overall.
Respect Everyone’s Rights
In any situation like this, everyone involved has certain rights which they are entitled to have respected. There are many times when people do not actively respect the rights of others in the situation, but you can’t allow that to happen if you want it to be fair on everyone. Besides, ultimately you will find that the law does not allow it, so you should make sure that you are respecting everyone’s rights from the start. You might find that the father has an advocate for father's rights beside them, in which case such rights will be made to be a part of the discussion much more naturally. But remember too your own rights, and the rights of your child, and that all of these rights are equal.
Communicate With The Children
The more that you can communicate with the children (if they are old enough to understand), the better, and yet this is something that far too many people overlook too often. The truth is that the more you communicate with your children, the more you can expect the right result to come from it all, as they will have their own opinion and you will be able to also make sure that they are not suffering too much from the conversation and the custody process. It is hugely important to keep them in the loop.
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